I think the wedding fever is in the air and SO SO many people are catching it. I haven't seen it this bad since a bunch of us graduated college back in 2004. Don't get me wrong I am super happy for everyone who is getting married/engaged or even having a baby. And maybe a part of me is jealous cause deep down I want all those things too but at the same time I can wait too. It just seems like the boom on engagement rings is CRAZY!!!
I am excited for everyone getting married cause I know what it is like to be excited to plan the BIG day!! But it's only one day and the rush fades and you are left with reality. I miss the marriage part. Being divorced I feel I have a totally new look on marriage and everything. Yes, the ring would be nice to wear and show off but I want the MARRIAGE!! I want the security of a marriage can bring, I want the feeling that this is my person FOREVER!! I know its pretty ironic coming from me (being divorced in all) but I cherish a marriage and I want one again. I hated that I got divorced and I still do this day hate that my marriage didn't work and that I failed at something. But I did learn a lot about what I want in a relationship and partner. And a PARTNER is what I want not a grown child or someone who thinks they are better than me.
One day I'll get there again and maybe I have found that one, who knows we are only 9 months into our relationship and I don't want to rush it. Luckily I have found someone in a similar boat we both have been divorced so we know what it is like and don't ever want to do that again. Meanwhile I am going to be happy for everyone getting engaged and married (secretly I'll be a little jealous too) and patiently wait for the day it becomes my turn to show off a sparkler.
No comments:
Post a Comment